1983
by Carolinus
Summary: "The TARDIS is at the pole." "Not far, then." "The South Pole." "Ah." Set after Cold War. After Clara and the Doctor are separated from the TARDIS in 1983, they embark on a journey to eventually find it at the South Pole, but they decide to take the scenic route and have a few adventures along the way. Told in vignettes.
1. Fond-a Fonda

"Now work those glutes, ladies!" the brunette with feathered curls shouted above the loud Michael Jackson single coming from the boombox in the corner. Dressed in a hot pink leotard and legwarmers, she led exercises on a foam mat atop the polished linoleum floor.

"You said this would be _fun,_ Doctor!" Clara panted. Soft wisps of her brown hair stuck out of her neon green sweatband as she desperately attempted to keep up with the instructor's pace.

"What about filming an exercise video with Jane Fonda _isn't_ fun?" the Doctor said, looking equally ridiculous in short, tight TARDIS-blue exercise shorts and a tank top, complete with clip-on bowtie. He grinned from ear to ear as he squatted in time to the beat. "One, two, up! One, two, down!"

"Keep smiling!" Jane yelled. "There you go, John!" she said to the Doctor. "Now everyone get on your mats! It's time for sit-ups!"

Clara sighed and collapsed in a heap on her mat. She could keep up with a dozen toddlers for hours, but she was never a much of a fan of organized exercise. The Doctor's "brilliant" idea was proving to be quite a challenge for her.

After two rounds of sit-ups, the camera stopped rolling for a water break. The exercisers walked off the set to find their gym bags. The Doctor playfully snapped a towel at Clara as she took a long swig from her multicoloured water bottle.

"Oi, you!" she exclaimed. He winked cheekily in response. Most of the fun of messing with Clara was her reaction, the Doctor thought.

"So, is this intended to replace our usual running?" Clara asked, cocking her head to the side.

The Doctor gave a sad, gentle smile, staring into the distance. "Oh, Clara," he said softly. "I'm always running. I never really stop."

Clara took another sip from her drink. She smiled. "This isn't as bad as I'm making it out to be. But you know, I get to pick the next place we go," she said.

"Oh, really, Ms. Oswald? Is that so?" the Doctor replied, raising his brow.

Clara nodded. "Yep. I'm the boss." She turned around and returned to her mat to stretch.

When the exercises began again, the Doctor really let himself loose. He shook, he pumped, and he wiggled in time to the music. When Jane asked for a shout, he gave the shout of an entire Sontaran squadron. His gangly limbs flopped all over the room, threatening to hit into the thin, twenty-something blonde with hair bigger than the lost moon of Poosh who was doing jumping jacks to his left. Despite his ridiculous appearance, he continued to smile, not knowing how silly he looked. Clara couldn't help but smile back at his obliviousness.

As the music reached a crescendo and the final chorus of "Thriller" played, the Doctor's moves became too much for even the forces of nature to handle. As he came down from a hop, he slipped on his right leg. He gasped, falling off to the side of his mat and tumbling into Clara. The crash was so thunderous that it caused the boombox to skip, leaving the room with an awkward silence and a lanky man on the ground. He laughed nervously and looked up at Clara.

"Well, Clara, we'd better be going now," he whispered. The video take was ruined and the whole room glared at them. Clara bit the insides of her cheeks raw trying to conceal her laughter as they shamefully gathered their belongings in a hurry, the Doctor muttering curses about gravity and Sir Isaac Newton all the way to the door.


	2. Bizmillah

"_Just gotta get out, just gotta get right out and – "_

The Doctor stood face-to-face across from a man with a thick, dark moustache. Dripping with sweat, they both crooned into the microphone they shared. The Doctor had removed his tweed jacket in the heat of the stage lights, while the other man wore a white v-neck tank top under an open white jacket with several buckles going across it. It resembled the marching band uniform that Clara begrudgingly wore in secondary school while she played the bass drum. Now, she was in the back playing the drums for the band while their drummer stood in the back playing the tambourine and smiling.

While the classic guitar solo played, the crowd roared. Lights flashed, illuminating the entire stage in a brilliant flurry of color. Fans in the audience jumped and screamed as they sang along to the music and raised signs proclaiming, "_We love Queen!"_

After a full set of all of their hits, the band took a brief break. Despite the ending of their show, the crowd demanded more. _"Encore! Encore! Encore!"_ they chanted.

"Care to do the honours, Doctor?" Freddie said with a grin.

"It's been a while, but… oh, of course, I'd _love_ to!" the Doctor said, resembling a giddy teenager more than an eleven hundred year old alien.

Freddie nodded at Brian, the guitarist with a mop of curly hair even more ridiculous than that of the Doctor's previous incarnation. Brian ducked out of his guitar strap and handed the Doctor his guitar made of dark wood and black accents.

The Doctor slipped the strap over his shoulders and looked out at the crowd.

"This one's for you, Liz!" he shouted with sweat dripping from his temples. Little did they know that he was simultaneously referring to the current queen's namesake, who lived four hundred years before them, _and_ her descendant in the fifty-first century.

As Clara played a drumroll on the set, he strummed out the guitar riff from the band's new take on "God Save the Queen." The twangy guitar voice resounded through the stadium, energizing the crowd. As the song came to a close, their cries became louder. Clara pounded the drums with all of her might. The Doctor savored every chord, bringing his arm up high after he strummed the last note in true rock-star fashion.

"Thank you!" he yelled. "Good night, London!" He grabbed Clara's hand and raised it up before taking a deep stage bow. As they left the stage, he spun her around as if they were dancing in a ballroom. He raised a peace sign to the crowd and blew a kiss.

"You're such a ham," Clara said with a chuckle.

"Hah!" the Doctor said, reveling in an adrenaline high from his performance. "I taught Freddie that song, you know. Well, not quite that _song,_ but that, er, arrangement of it. We were having a jam session one night and we experimented with different sounds. A lot like science, music is," he said as he tapped her nose. He pulled out two pairs of sunglasses and handed one to her, wrapping his arm around her shoulder while they walked down the hall backstage.

"Feels pretty good to be a rock star, eh, Clara?"

"Yeah," she said, their shoulders bumping into each other as they walked. "It does."


End file.
